


The Only One

by mellonicle



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, One Shot, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:09:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27790543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mellonicle/pseuds/mellonicle
Summary: “You know, we’ve been friends for 5 years, and all that time, I’ve hidden this feeling.”
Relationships: Jean Kirstein/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 33





	The Only One

**Author's Note:**

> Short fic for sadboi Jean

“I loved you.”

I tried to remain calm as those three words slipped from Jean’s lips. My heart started to beat faster as his brown eyes bore straight to mine. No sign of joke on his face. He was serious. And my stomach started to twist in pleasant feeling due to the three words that still ringing in my mind.

I’ve been in love with Jean for… forever. Since the first time he approached me to ask where was his class. Since the first time he told me the correct answer of the pop quiz teacher ask me suddenly. Since the first time we hang out together on the river bank near his house. I’ve been in love with him and I don’t have any idea how to tell him this. Showing my feeling wasn’t my strong suit after all. I had too much pride, sadly. I couldn’t even tell my brother I love him, how could I tell a boy, who was I deeply in love with him, that?

Now he told me by himself that he was actually in love with me too. Could you imagine how happy I am?

“You know, we’ve been friends for 5 years, and all that time, I’ve hidden this feeling,” Jean said, a sad laugh following after that. He scratched the back of his head as his eyes were looking to the river in front of us.

“And I’m tired of being the only one that in love.”

Me too...

“That’s why, today I want to say goodbye to the feeling I have for you, Y/N.”

I turn my head to him. Confused. Anxious. Disappointed. He was picking the grass below him, a small smile grazed his lips.

Wait, what did this mean?

“I have loved you for 5 years. Giving you hint. Showing you that I care for you and I love you. But you always thought I was joking. You laughed when I said I missed you when I was away. You told me I was silly when I told you you will be a good mother for my kids, you thought it was a terrible joke. You always saw me as your friend and nothing more. You never took the hints. And I’m tired.”

My heart aches. Did he really think like that? Didn’t he know me well that I did that because I was scared? Didn’t he know it really well that I was scared if he was joking all this time when he gave me the hints? And I didn’t know those hints were real!

Jean gave a short laugh, throwing away the grass he just picked from the ground. And for me, it feels like he was picking my feeling then throw it away.

“I have found someone else. When I found her I thought my heart just trying to forget you and once I know her well, my feeling for you will be back. But it didn’t.”

 _It didn’t_. The word slapped me harder than I thought.

“And I’m in love with her.”

I think I’m going to cry at this point. But I just nodded in acknowledgment, as if I didn’t really care about it.

“I just think you should know about my feeling for you since I feel I’m not completely moving on if I didn’t say this to you.”

He smiled. I smiled back, though my heart already shattered into pieces now.

“Well, I’m happy that you have found someone, and you told me about your feeling,” I said, gulping when I felt a lump logged on my throat. His smile got wider.

“I never took the hint cause I think of you as my friend. And we loved to joke around, right? So, I’m sorry about that. But you don’t have to doubt that I love you.” I said, swearing that he could hear the hint of a joke in the last sentence since he was smirking. Though I was not joking. I was really in love.

“As a friend?” he asked. And I smiled, nodded.

“Yes, as a friend.”

We watched the sunset together as he told me nothing will be changed after this confession. We will still be friends. We will still hang out together on the river bank.

I would be still in love with him.

The only thing that changed was him not loving me anymore. And me being the only want that in love.


End file.
